Regifting

Guilty confession, I have regifted.  My philosophy is, hey, you give me a junky $2 candle set that even you wouldn't buy for yourself, don't be too surprised if you see that same candle set in a brown paper sack at next year's White Elephant Christmas party.

Reenactment: (Names have been changed to protect the crappy gift giver and my regifting accomplices...)

Friend A:"What are you bringing to the give at the party?"

Me: "EEEKKKK! That's tonight? Hmmmmmmmmm, how bout this?"

Friend A: "Didn't CGG (Crappy gift giver) give that to you?"

Me: "Yep..."

Friend A: "What is it?"

Me: "I think it's a teddybear jewelry set..."

Friend A: "How old are we?"

Me: "Apparently, she thinks we are all still 14 years old...:

Friend A: "Wrap it up lets go!"

Me: "Isn't she coming to the party?"

Friend A: "Yep"

Me: "Huh, this could get messy..."

The Party begins. White elephant game is underway. 2 hours pass. All gifts are given. 

CGG: "Wow! Look what I got? A teddy bear jewelry set! Debbie, didn't I get you one of these last year?  How great! Now we can have matching sets!"

Me:  "Great..."

You don't know how much juggling I had to do to weasel myself out of 'Matching Jewelry Tuesday'.  Lesson learned: Perhaps don't regift a gift while the person who gave it to you is there. 

Regifting is a frowned upon act. However, I think people fail to see the positive side of it. Such as, hey I didn't throw it away and look, now it can live to be regifted another day... We need to stay optimistic people! After so many transactions of regifting it will eventually wind up in the hands of someone who completely and totally loves it! Who am I to keep a gift, that in the future, could be given to someone who really wants it and could provide so much joy?!? So you see, it really is a service to the public to regift. Remember that when you feel the need to look down on someone for regifting, plus, we all know you've done it too! 

(Reenactment was based on a true story from my early 20's and NO, CGG never realized that the gift was originally from her to me.) Horrible? Maybe... But then again, maybe not...

Parenting = time share at plaza de crazy

(Disclaimer: This was written late at night and on about 3 hours of sleep from the night before. If you read this and have no idea what I'm talking about, don't worry, I'm sure I'll wake up tomorrow, read it, and wonder the exact same thing.....)

"Seriously?!? Why is there a puddle in the middle of my living room??!?!?" 

"Why is there an plastic army man sitting on the top shelf of the fridge?!?!?"

"Are you sure you aren't Chinese? Cause I have no idea what you are saying...."

     These are questions that either float through my mind or come out of my mouth. Charley is my energetic, cute, loving little guy. He loves toy cars, chicken nuggets and long strolls on the beach. He also loves to leave me a bit puzzled. 

     

     Case in point, food: The kid won't touch a banana but he'll eat play-doh....(scratching head in confusion) I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm all about trying new things, but lets maybe master the basics before we dive into eating indigestible art supplies....

     Chocolate milk is a staple in my home. I actually start to panic when the carton gets below half. My 3 year old is like a heroin junky when it comes to his milk. He has the milk-man on speed dial and I already have an intervention scheduled for next month, I still have to write my letter....

     

     I have often heard that if your child doesn't end up in prison you have succeeded as a parent. You know I say, a better mark for success should be:

     

     1) Is my child making VooDoo dolls and sacrificing them in their room after you put them to bed?

     

     2) Have I caught my 3 year old driving my car and he didn't refill the tank when he got home?

     3) Does my child have a mysterious cash flow coming in from the playground?

If you answered 'YES' to any of these questions, you have failed and I am judging you right now for it. Can you feel the judgement? Ok not really cause I'm pretty sure Charley has been taking the car out late at night to buy and sell VooDoo dolls........